Title: White Christmas
Artst: Panic! At The Disco
1. N. T. Wright doesn’t parse nouns. They decline themselves before him.
2. When James Dunn came up with the New Perspective, it was already old to N. T. Wright.
3. N. T. Wright doesn’t baptize infants. He sprinkles the hell out of them.
4. Dead theologians sit around and read books about N. T. Wright.
5. The Trinity isn’t a mystery to N. T. Wright.
6. N. T. Wright doesn’t read books. He stares at them until he gets the information he wants.
7. N. T. Wright once preached all night in an upper room. No one fell asleep.
8. Instead of playing crossword puzzles during breakfast, N. T. Wright solves New Testament manuscript variances.
9. N. T. Wright knows the Adamic tongue. But he only uses it to order take out.
10. N. T. Wright makes purple the most masculine color.
11. N. T. Wright is actually the guy Paul is talking about in 2 Corinthians 12.
12. N.T. Wright is only bald because his hair got too scared of his brain.